I said I'd cook. I didn't say I'd cook well.

Mid-century advertising style, redrawn: a fifties illustration with the sparkle and a line it would never have printed, in black and red. Retro sass on a mug.

She promised dinner, not a miracle. The smoke's still clearing, the roast's a write-off, and the mug says so before she does.

Retro script and bold capitals wrap right round the mug, the whole confession travelling with the handle wherever it lands.